Since the ex and I have split, I've been trying to get to know myself. Sounds silly, doesn't it?
How can someone say that after nearly 30 years they don't know themself? How is it possible for someone to be so blind for so long?
Comfort has a funny way of doing that to a person. Well, okay, comfort combined with fear. As I've said previously, I've been afraid of a lot in my lifetime and that has truly held me back, in all areas. But, sadly enough, I was so comfortable in my fear, because I've had it for so long, that I just couldn't bring myself to break out of that miserable cycle.
So here I am. I've been working on me and I've been making progress. I'm feeling good (most days) and I'm beginning to embrace the opportunities that are out there.
It's been a difficult road, letting go of the past. But what do you do when the person you want to hold onto doesn't want to be held? There's not much that you can do, while still keeping your dignity, besides let go so that's what I'm doing.
The weight is coming off (down another 3.5 pounds this month), the smile is coming back, the tears are fewer and farther between and the interest in really living is returning. I'm starting to feel alive again.
I guess he was right. I guess I will be okay. :)