Thursday, June 30, 2005
Wednesday, June 29, 2005
Do You Have A...
Him: "Do you have a REALLY, REALLY big boyfriend?"
Him: "Do you have a REALLY, REALLY small boyfriend?"
Him: "Do you have a medium sized boyfriend?"
Him: "Do you want to dance with me?"
Why I Blog
- I blog because I need an outlet (who doesn't?).
- I blog because I want to get different points of view on certain situations.
- I blog because it keeps me thinking and, I hope, growing.
- I blog because I enjoy it.
Monday, June 27, 2005
Sunday, June 26, 2005
Things I Miss
Saturday, June 25, 2005
Learning To Be Happy With Who I Am
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
Rantings, Ravings and the Usual Nonsense
I make myself laugh though. I have been in love twice. I fell for Love #1 when I was just 14. Love #2 (now formerly known to you as the ex) happened a little less than 10 years later. I was 23. There is nothing remotely similar in my experiences with these men. Love #1 and I only dated for about a month. I was in love with him long before that and for a long time after that. When we broke up it bothered me but was not a heart-wrenching event because I knew, in my heart, that we were not over. Not for forever anyway. (Looking at it now, I'm probably wrong.) With Love #2, as you've seen, there was/is more of a sense of permanence to the end of our romantic relationship.
Love #1 has sort of faded from my life. We were best friends for a long time, both before and after we dated. Of course, I suppose you could say we were also best friends with benefits for part of that time. And him not being in my life now is not the result of a fight or a tragic event. I started dating Love #2 and Love #1 moved away (and sucks at keeping in touch).
When Love #1's mother found out that Love #2 and I had split, she suggested I go visit Love #1. Wouldn't that be funny? Using Love #1 to get over Love #2! I thought about it but decided to rely on some of my other friends instead. I have to admit though that I've been thinking about Love #1 a lot these days.
A Sign Of Growth?
Saturday, June 18, 2005
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
A Taste of Life
Sunday, June 12, 2005
I've Been Tagged
Here's how it works:
Pick 5 of the following questions and then complete the sentences. Then pass it on to 3 more of your blog friends! (No tag backs allowed.)
If I could be a scientist?
If I could be a farmer?
If I could be a musician?
If I could be a doctor?
If I could be a painter?
If I could be a gardener?
If I could be a missionary?
If I could be a chef?
If I could be an architect?
If I could be a linguist?
If I could be a psychologist?
If I could be a librarian?
If I could be an athlete?
If I could be a lawyer?
If I could be an inn-keeper?
If I could be a professor?
If I could be a writer?
If I could be a llama-rider?
If I could be a bonnie pirate?
If I could be an astronaut?
If I could be a world famous blogger?
If I could be a justice on any one court in the world?
If I could be married to any current famous political figure?
If I could be a musician: I would be able to be plays tons of instruments and sing. I used to play clarinet but wanted to learn saxaphone, drums, piano and guitar to name a few. I tried to teach myself piano and guitar but couldn't get the hang of it.
If I could be a chef: I would be able to make more than a few italian and mexican dishes; I'd use simple ingredients that everyone has heard and people would rave about my creations (because that's what they'd be called)!
If I could be a librarian: I would read as much as I could during the day and take books home with me all the time. I'd also try to offer programs that would get people back to the library and reading again.
If I could be an inn-keeper: I have always harbored a little dream of owning a bed and breakfast. I think it would be really nice except for two things: letting strange people into my home and cooking for them EVERY morning!
If I could be a writer: I already am, sort of. I really enjoy Jennifer Weiner's books so if I could be a writer I'd like to think I'd have a similar style but I'd sell so many that my cash flow would rival that of Danielle Steele!
Okay, I'm going to tag Mary, Srini and Robin.
No Developments But Having Fun All The Same
Friday, June 10, 2005
When Exactly Is That Line Crossed?
I had considered writing about my goal. You know the one I'm talking about. The one I seem really excited about and seem close to reaching, otherwise known as, the one I'm sabotaging! Yes, I haven't brought it up this week because I'm a little embarassed. But today I decided that you have "heard" me in lower moments so why not share this with you?
How does one explain it? I enjoy working out now but between the heat and, I suppose, my frustration at this little plateau, I have (not given up but) allowed myself to get sidetracked. The really pathetic part is that I know that I'm sidetracked but that didn't stop me from getting McDonald's for lunch, it didn't stop me from having ice cream yesterday. Mary made perfect sense the other day (on the phone) when she said that she can totally talk herself out of self destructive diet behavior when she's not making bad decisions. Basically, when she's doing "wrong" she knows it but doesn't stop it. Hey, we must be related. Oh yea, we are! She's probably going to comment on this and tell me that I'm quoting her wrong. That's okay because I forget exactly what it was that she said but it did make perfect sense! (It was only two days ago, I shouldn't have forgotten already!)
Anyway, it's what I've been doing. I was cursing myself with every bite of that McDonald's. But don't be fooled. I finished it. And I enjoyed it.
Well, as distracted as I've been I'm still not going to give up. But I do need to get back on track. I guess I'll have to start walking later in the evenings when it's cooled down some. It's also cool that I'm going to be doing t-shirt shows too. Even though I don't always eat the best foods at the shows, I'm working hard and drinking a lot of water.
Speaking of which, I have a show tomorrow. I have to be there to start setting up between 7 and 7:30 am. After the first part is done we have to pack up and move a few towns over and set up again. The parade (part 2 of the day) is at 6 pm. So I'll work, essentially, a 16-17 hour day tomorrow. It doesn't suck as much as it sounds. This is purely a part-time gig for me and it's my choice. The people I work for are great, the pay is good and it's a day out around a lot of people.
Among those people will be the Alleged Inquiring Mind (AIM). Well, I'm not sure if he'll be there. I'm kind of hoping he will be though. If he is I'll have to remember not to act like an imbecile. You know, like I did last weekend! Well, okay, I didn't exactly act like an idiot. After this guy I know said that AIM was asking about me, I just got self-conscious. It's been a long time since I allowed myself to be affected by something like that. When I was with the ex, I was with him (exactly where I wanted to be, in the sense that although I had a lot of things me things to work on I wanted to be with him no matter where that was) so I didn't even give anyone else any consideration. Now that I'm single though, well, it's a different story altogether. I just have to remember how to flirt and talk without sounding like a moron.
I've said quite a bit for someone with Writer's Block, huh? When I titled this entry, I was going to talk about how it's funny to me that now that I'm feeling good, I have less to write about. I guess I should just abandon that train of thought!
Have a great weekend everyone! Hopefully I'll have something slightly more interesting to post Sunday. Hey, Patrice, have a great trip!
Monday, June 06, 2005
The Hardest Part About Blogging...
Saturday, June 04, 2005
I started my summer bowling league on Thursday night. I know a lot of the people from bowling with them in previous leagues but there are also a lot of new teams. And it's a mixed league so that means there are new men for me to meet! (Not that I'm necessarily looking to jump into something---but I'm not going to prevent anything from developing either!)
Anyway, it was a fun evening. I bowled so badly. So on Friday I took my ball up to the pro shop and had it cleaned, polished and had new grips put in. The guy I took it to is amazing (thanks to the ex for suggesting him). I went in, told him I wanted my current balled cleaned and to add new grips and I told him I was considering buying a new ball. I explained the problems I'm having and he actually talked me out of a new ball. After doing what I asked to the current ball and polishing it, he gave a few pointers for when I release it and told me that if my scores don't improve this week that I should then come back and he'd help me pick a new ball. Now that is how to get business. I just thought it was really cool that he bypassed a $100+ sale and just made some suggestions. I'll definately go back to him (not the pro shop in the alley I bowl at, not the next alley located on the highway but to the one after that).
Today I worked. I don't know if I have previously mentioned it but during the summer (mostly) I help a couple that I've known for a few years with their t-shirt business. Mostly we sell fire department shirts but sometimes they have EMT shirts too.
Anyway, one of the people I know from doing these shows said that a young man was inquiring about me and my dating status/eligibility. Hmmm. I like that idea. I noticed the alleged Inquiring Mind and he was cute. Unfortunately, I got a little nervous so the few words I exchanged with him were meaningless. On the positive side though, I did actually exchange some words with him. DUH! I should have told him my name and asked for his but akwardness abounded and I was like a 12-year-old just figuring out she likes boys but isn't quite sure why! Well, I walked away from the day with a smile and the possibility of running into the alleged Inquiring Mind at another show (like maybe next weekend)!
After the show, one of my other friends (who worked with us today) and I went to dinner. Well, we walked into the restaurant, which was packed and opted to do a little shopping at a nearby store for a bit in an effort to wait out some of the crowd. Let me tell you, I found such a cute little top! I liked the top but when she saw me in it, she raved. So I bought it. Not too bad, it was only $20. And that's all I bought, despite how much I tried on. Once we were done we went back to the restaurant and had very yummy salads for dinner.
I'm excited. I feel good. There's a whole world out there just waiting for me and I'm ready to start taking it on! Wahoo!