Home of an Emotional Idiot

While there were times when he wished he could roll back the clock and erase all the sadness, he had a hunch that if he did so, the joy would be diminished as well. And that was something he couldn't contemplate. (From At First Sight by Nicholas Sparks)

Thursday, July 20, 2006

What Can I Say?

Well, my dad seems to be doing pretty well. His spirits are great and I'm hoping that will help facilitate the healing process. He has been in a lot of pain but he's a trooper, to say the least. Tomorrow is his and my mom's 33rd wedding anniversary. I hope he's not too upset not to be home for it.

My AJ gave me a little scare tonight. She recently developed an overgrowth of skin around a tooth or what once was a tooth. It got infected and we got her antibiotics and the infection went away but not the overgrowth. The other day, as I was giving her her medication, I noticed that it was starting to grow and to look greenish again. I told my mom and asked her to call the vet and see if we could get more antibiotics without having to bring AJ in. They gave them to us. Well, the green is gone from what I can tell but now there is an enormous blood blister. She had those before so I'm not too concerned. However, as we were taking our evening stroll, she tripped or slid on a pinecone. (Yes, things are that bad.) Anyway, she went down like a ton of bricks. In the process, part of the blood blister broke off. She was bleeding for a while after that but seems okay now. There's a big protrusion on her snout where this thing is but it doesn't seem to phase her. I'm a little freaked out though. Even though I know it's not too far off in the future, I'm never going to be ready to let her go. She's my baby.

I still haven't spoken to AIM. I feel like something is off. However, as I've already stated the first anniversary of his mom's passing was last week, his new niece was born the following day, both of his aunts (from CT and FL) are visiting (I know this only because they were in the pictures he emailed of the new baby) and I'm sure he's been going out at night. I've been good though. I've been strong. Well, in the sense that I haven't emailed, called, text messaged or Instant Messaged him. But I really do miss him.

So I'm stressing over not talking to him and wondering how things are going and if everything's alright, plus what is going on in my life, plus I'm taking on worrying about some of our friends. One girl flew to Texas tonight. She's been planning the trip for a month or so now. She was going to meet a guy she "met" on MySpace and has been talking to for hours each day. I can hardly wait to hear how it goes. I'll admit I'm addicted to MySpace but I'm weary about meeting people on it. Most of my friends on it are people I actually know in real life. Another of our friends just found out her uncle passed away. Apparently he had cancer. She's supposed to go away this weekend but I wonder if she will now. In a way, I hope she does, for her own mental health.

I have been fairly attitude free at work since last weekend. It seems like it's been a lifetime since that conversation! Hopefully by the time they get around to doing my review they'll have forgotten that little snafu. Yesterday, we closed the office at 11 because there was no power. That was cool. I went shopping, had lunch and went to visit my dad early. I couldn't really afford to go shopping but I had a coupon which usually means that I wouldn't find a single thing that I liked even a little. Of course, this time I didn't have that luck. I picked up two pairs of gauchos (finally, I find some that I like and think look decent on me), a bunch of t-shirts (each $7 off the original price) and a little knit-type sweater to go with one of the camis I have. With my coupon I saved $25. Grand total came to around $123. Not too shabby.

Did I mention that I couldn't really afford to go shopping? I thought so. It's just that it makes it kind of funny that I have decided that I absolutely MUST have a digital camera. And I mean soon. Like, it would be wonderful to have it when Mary and Bill get married, which for anyone who doesn't know and does care, is three months from tomorrow. Oh yea. The other thing... I'm going to Germany next spring. My supervisor wants to go visit her family and thought I should go with her. I've never been overseas and never really had any inclination to go, to be honest. But you know what? I'm never going to have this kind of opportunity again so I'm going to take it. I need to start doing that more in my life. Anyway, I'll have to pay airfare and anything that we wind up doing but apparently we'd stay with her family so lodging wouldn't be an issue. I'm kind of excited. Nervous enough that I haven't started to fill out the passport application but still excited... enough to get me to commit to this trip anyway!


  • At 7/21/2006 12:45 PM, Blogger lonna said…

    I'm glad that your dad is feeling better. This sounds like it's been so hard on him and your family.

    Your poor dog has been through so much too. I'm glad that she doesn't seem to be as affected by all of this as you are (and I would be the same way).


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