Home of an Emotional Idiot

While there were times when he wished he could roll back the clock and erase all the sadness, he had a hunch that if he did so, the joy would be diminished as well. And that was something he couldn't contemplate. (From At First Sight by Nicholas Sparks)

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Booty Call Inquiry

Yes, you read that headline correctly and no, I'm not looking for a booty call. My good friend A was telling me, last night, about the guy she's been seeing for the last four months or so and because of my overall inexperience with such things I couldn't give her any good solid advice. The situation boggles my mind and I can't even pretend to understand it. Therefore, I am turning to you for help.

When a man makes a booty call does he typically take her out? If he does take her out, does he pay or does he make her pay her own way? If he takes her out, is it unusual for him to take her out with a group of his friends or with his family? If he takes her out with friends or family around, does he hold her hand the entire time or treat her like a pal? Once they're alone and intimacies (ahem) are out of the way, does he cuddle with her? Does he keep on kissing her? Does he laugh and play around with her or does he get dressed and more or less send her packing?

I've always considered a booty call to be when you make the call and invite someone to meet you and "take care of business" and then part ways. I don't know what to tell her about him taking her out with both his friends and his family on separate occasions, about him paying her way when they do things, about his cuddling habits afterwards. I'm just as confused as she is about the whole situation but feel like I need to bring something back to her. Any opinions?

A is having a difficult time with this guy. She cares for him so much and would do anything for him but she's beginning to feel like she's only a booty call. Until he starts inviting her to hang out with his family and friends and acts like her boyfriend. She begins to hope then and hope is a beautiful but dangerous thing.

3 Comments:

  • At 9/24/2006 2:03 PM, Blogger Jen said…

    It sounds like a booty call to me. The guy can go through all sorts of pains, taking her out, paying he way, etc., but if it is not a commited relationship and it keeps going on then I would say it is a booty call type of thing. He is just doing a little more work so that he can keep her around as a booty call, but if something better came along he would be gone. Bottom line, if she feels like it is a booty call, then it is.

     
  • At 9/25/2006 10:41 AM, Blogger Robin Rivers said…

    Yeah, I have to agree with Jen. Sex is sex, even with all the nice extras. Unless he's agreed to it evolving into something more, she's (IMHO) in for a load of hurt if she thinks it'll eventually be something more.
    Men aren't wired like women. They have the ability to separate sex and love.

     
  • At 9/25/2006 10:56 AM, Blogger lonna said…

    I'm wondering if he's trying to make himself feel better, by doing all of the things beyond the normal booty call. He's certainly confusing your friend.

     

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